Once upon a time I had a great big house with a great big lawn and a lot of stuff.
The whole place was carpeted, even the bathrooms and, gack, the kitchen. So, my then husband and I decided to renovate.
First, the carpet and subfloor in the kitchen had to be removed. We hired a big guy to do that job.
It was a hot summer day. I hid up in my bedroom because, while in fantasyland having a big sweaty workman in the house and hubby nowhere in site is a good thing, in my real, pre-erotica writing days, the dude gave me the creeps.
Oh how he worked! Great heaving sounds emanated from below, punctuated with exclamations like, 'Shit!' and 'Fuck! and 'Christ!' and 'Goddam!' and 'Piss!'
Finally, all was silent. I ventured downstairs to survey the scene. Yes, the subfloor was up. Yes, the big workman was mopping his brow.
'Tough job,' he said.
'I could tell,' I said.
He looked at me, surprise etched on his big man face. 'I was only using the soft swears,' he replied.
Hmmm. Made me wonder. What are the hard swears?
- Madeline Moore
- Toronto, Ontario, Canada
- Wild Card, 2006. Winner of "best oral sex scene" - Scarlet Magazine. Amanda's Young Men, 2009. Excerpted in Scarlet Magazine; Juicy Bits. Sarah's Education, 2009. Hit the #1 spots on Amazon.co.uk adult fiction & adult romance best seller lists. Jade Magazine bestowed the best cover art, 2009 award on Sarah's Education. "Get Up, Stand Up!" which appeared in The Cougar Book (Logical-Lust) won me the title 'Story Teller of the Year 2011' at The Erotic Awards, London, UK. Sarah's Education took the #3 spot on a list of the 30 most titillating titles of all time, as reported in English Daily Mail ;Female; Nov. 12, 2012. Debutante, a petite novel for e-publisher Imprint Mischief, (Harper-Collins) pubbed in 2012. I tutor writing students and am a member of the WGC. D.M. Thomas said: Madeline Moore writes great sex without metaphor and that's not easy to do. Kris Saknussemm said: You're a good egg, Madeline Moore. I am a good egg who writes great sex without metaphor! Yippee!