Contest Time!

Guess who decided to buy my cougar novel? Yes, those kinky Germans, already avid readers of Lust - Poker and Lektionen will soon be able to order - um - Amanda's Junger Manner or something like that.

Here's a young German hunk:
His name is Kamil Bak.






Want to see his face?
Are you sure?
Okay.

Pardon me. That's not his face. That's him looking down at his torn tee shirt. Oh me oh my. I wonder if Amanda tore it off him?

Here's a picture of his face. I wonder if his name changes to Kamil Front.
HA HA!





Here's a fun little contest.
Guess what Amanda's Young Men will be titled in German and if you guess correctly, I'll send you a copy of Lust-Poker and a copy of Lektionen.


Lord knows, I've got quite a few of them kicking around.

Viel Gluck.

xoxo Mad

ps - I don't know how to umlaut on Blogger, so sue me.

A Valentine for . . . Charlie Sheen

This is a special edition of Eye Candy Monday. Not all the pictures are pretty.

Remember, Charlie, when you smiled like this?

But you don't smile that way any more. For quite some time, shots of Charlie Sheen show a grim guy wearing a hat and shades.

Word is, you're thinking of getting gold teeth. For fun? Well, maybe . . .
or maybe it's because when you do smile, showing your teeth, you look like this:

Readers may ask why I send a Valentine to a guy who hits women.

This guy has hit women:

I think drugs and alcohol had a lot (I'm not saying everything) to do with why he did. And why you do.
Eminem had the guts to record a song, with Rihanna, called "Love the Way You Lie," that actually examines violence against women. It isn't really as simple an issue as we thought it was. I learned this from an abused wife I tried to help. Now, we've all learned it, from Eminem and Rihanna.

But he had to get better to make an album like Recovery. (Winner of the 2011 Grammy for best Rap Album of the Year)

You're in rehab now, Charlie. You could recover. Here's a guy who looked like he was down for the count, not all that long ago. This is Robert Downey, Jr.'s mug shot. He went to rehab and paid attention. And he did it. Day by day, for ten years now, he has stayed away from the same demons that are killing you.

Now he looks like this.

Charlie, you are the highest paid actor on TV and the star of a hit comedy show, Two and a Half Men that is now in its eighth season. You're number one, man. Except today the last episode that's been shot will air, after which the show goes "on hiatus." It's all up to you, now.
Please get better.

I'm not afraid. To take a stand.
Everybody, come take my hand.
We'll walk this road together.

- Not afraid, from Recovery, by Eminem.

Charlie Sheen, you are not alone.

Love, Madeline

addendum: this just in: Charlie acts weird on sports radio.

My Convo with the Chicken Soup Guy

My eye cream has been gently massaged around the eye area and I've let Leo Van Meow Meow go out on the balcony so he can see that the weather has not changed much since this morning. I've set up the heater in front of the expensive chapel chair that is now his and I've bid him a fond good night.

It's time to join Felix, already fast asleep in our comfy King size bed. Soon I shall slip into that state of bliss we call sleep, content with what I have accomplished on this uneventful but not unpleasant Wednesday -

Wednesday? Why, that means I'm supposed to have a new post up tomorrow. I faithfully promised my fans new posts on Monday and Thursday. It's already g.d. Thursday in the UK, where both of them live. Oh fer the love of Mike!

Power up, oh keeper of promises. Draw from the mighty imagination that has conjured up three entire erotica novels and countless, that is if you count on your fingers and toes, sexy short stories. Write something and throw in some pictures and go to bed. It can't be all that hard . . . can it?

Can - didn't I have an idea earlier in the week - something about a can - a can of soup - a can of chicken soup? I did. I do. I remember now!

My Correspondence with the webmaster for Chicken Soup for the Soul

Subject: Submissions: Hello Chicken Soup. Your Submission Guidelines neglect to indicate the amount you pay for the stories you include in your books. Please tell me: What do you pay? Warmest Regards, Madeline Moore

The reply:RE:Submissions Dear Madeline: Thank you for your inquiry. If your story is selected for publication in one of our Chicken Soup for the Soul books then you will receive a one-time fee of $200 and ten free copies of the book your story appears in (worth more than $100) for the rights to print your story. This information is included on our website. We look forward to getting some submissions from you. Sincerely, Chicken Soup for the Soul

Hmmm. I go to Amazon and try to count the number of Chicken Soup books. I quit counting at two hundred. I get irritable. My reply:

I am afraid that a payment of two hundred dollars for inclusion in a franchise that is making millions for its editors would cause this writer's soul great pain.


I start thinking about this issue. After all, what does Reader's Digest pay its contributors? Well, while it still pays Americans real dollars, Canadians contributors are now paid with a subscription to the magazine.

I start checking out the authors with contributions in Chicken Soup for the Writer's Soul. Some are: Ernest J. Gaines, Terry McMillan, Sue Grafton, Steve Allen, George Plimpton, and Ray Bradbury. I found Gloria Steinham's name as a contributor to another of the Chicken Soup books, I don't remember which one, but that was when I stopped searching authors and sent this reply to the webmaster:

On Second Thought: Me again. Having visited Amazon and admired the many, many pages of Chicken Soup anthologies, as well as noticing that Gloria Steinham has contributed to one of them, I have changed my mind. Perhaps what I should do, instead of whining at you, is purchase Chicken Soup for the Writer's Soul. It isn't easy being a writer but it's harder to be a bitter writer than a hopeful one. I must try to stay on the hopeful side. In case I haven't made myself clear, I apologise for my response to your polite reply to my initial inquiry.

The final reply from the webmaster:
Hi Madeline Many people are interested in being included in one of our Chicken Soup for the Soul books. We get more than a few thousand story and poem submissions for each book title we publish. We do hope that, after reconsidering, you will submit your work to us. Chicken Soup for the Soul

So there you go. Of course now I'm trying to think up my own franchise. Something like Borscht for Bitter Bastards or Minestrone for the Miserable or Stone Soup for the Stoner or Lentil Soup for Losers but mostly, I'm just thinking I did the right thing. Do you?

Nightie night. Mad.

Eye Candy Monday - Spartacus - Gods of the Arena

Are you watching this series?

If not, you are missing a show that guarantees sexy men in loincloths battling to the death in the arena:

or mouth-watering sex scenes:

Most of the time, you get a great big hunk

or two:

or more:

AND sex with one (slave diddling Lucy Lawless doesn't count):

or two:

or more:

If you missed Season one: Spartacus: Blood and Sand
then you're in for a double (triple?) treat.

Just doin' my Monday Morning job - bringing you eye candy to make you drool.

xoxo Mad

Cut Up Poetry

I have been inspired by Kristina Lloyd's post on cut ups, (which you might wish to check out after you read my post) to create a cut up poem of my own. A word of explanation: as a gift to Felix I took the poems he had written for me and cut lines from them. These were collected in a box so that, should he ever need inspiration, he could pick a slip of paper from the box and read his own marvellous words. I'm sorry to say that the original poems are lost, so these cut ups are all that are left. This is particularly unfortunate as he wrote an entire sonnet for me.

I've taken the slips of paper and created this cut-up poem. Cut-up by Madeline Moore. Words by Felix Baron. Printed, of course, with his permission.


In my youth I hunted for that impossible woman
the one I desired above all things, to own.
I grew weary; the hunting stopped.
You came and lay your head in my lap.

I will make love to you forever,
my sweet, deliciously depraved, slut.

You are imprisoned in my palace,
where you reign under my foot.

I value your pristine beauty
and deface it in proof of its infinite worth.

When your mind is blank
You are sagacious beyond natural wisdom.

You have no defence but your vulnerability
So your armour is adamantine.

Without your neck beneath my foot, I am unbalanced.
Without you riding me, I am weighed down.

When my cock isn’t in you, I have no cock.

Your serenity inspires in me such cruelty
that if I could reach so deep, I would mark your soul . . . but I need not.
It is branded already, by your own hand
and the smouldering scar spells out my name.

Alas, all that remains of the Sonnet:


So deep is she that ‘humble’ seems like ‘proud,’
So lovely, Aphrodite bears a frown
And Her divine form shamefully does shroud,
Deep in the folds of Her celestial gown.

But mine is wise, as wise as she is brave.
Surrender brings her all that she could crave.

Photo Credits:
lion:dominance - sonja anderson fineartamerica.com
resting lions: http://www.zazzle.co.uk/lion_lioness_resting
Aphrodite:by Lenasharmen Photobucket.com