Eye Candy Monday - Nicki Minaj

O.M.G. who is this beautiful beast? A singer, I gather, although I haven't heard her voice, yet. I don't know anything about her except this:

No wait, I know this about her, too: I know how to pronounce her name. Minaj (Me-naj)

I think she might like to drink champagne.

I'm guessing she likes to play with herself and if I were her I'd like to play with myself, too. If I were me, I'd like to play with her. Wait a minute, I am me! Nicki Minaj, come play with me. In your dreams, you say?
Okay. Nightie night.

And that's all I know. Except that in my opinion, she makes most excellent Monday Morning Eye Candy and if you don't agree with me, well . . .

I'll let her tell you what I think of that.

pictures: http://www.anorak.co.uk/

Grammar Updates

Yikes. Over on Linked In I entered into a discussion on Grammar and was shamed by my two pet peeves, which turned out to be erroneous. So, fellow authors, I share with you my errors to save you from making the same ones in your work.

1) none: My understanding: none means 'not one.' It is, therefore, always singular. An example:

"None of the actresses' noses was real."

For this I was trounced. None, it turns out, means not only 'not one' but also 'not any.' Usage depends on which one makes a more pleasing sentence.
And so this sentence is grammatically correct.

"None of the actresses' noses were real."

I stand, trembling at the knees, corrected.

From the grammar goddess: Indefinite pronouns by definition reference nonspecific things or people. Most of these pronouns take a singular verb, some are always plural, and a few may be either singular or plural. Take a look at the lists below, and you'll notice that most indefinite pronouns are singular.

* Singular: another, anybody, anyone, anything, each, either, everybody, everyone, everything, many a, neither, no one, nobody, nothing, one, other, somebody, someone

* Plural: both, few, many, others, several

* Singular or Plural: all, any, none, some, such



2) they: My understanding: The word 'they' is plural.

"They sure look like they're having a lot of fun."

Again, I was trounced. It turns out that 'they' has been used, since Middle and Early Modern English times, in both plural and singular forms. In the Eighteenth Century, singular 'they' and 'he or she,' were replaced with 'he' in an attempt to stress male dominance.

From The Vocabula Review:

But even an Act of Parliament in 1850 England, which banned official use of the expression he or she in favor of generic he , didn't affect the spoken language (Bodine 173).

So this sentence is entirely correct:

"I can't tell from this picture if the person is male or female but they sure have a great body."

I am no longer able to stand corrected, but must sit. I must sit and ponder this: Shakespeare used 'they' as singular as well as plural. If he did it, I'll do it. At least, I'll give it a try.

Picture credits:
Jennifer Grey: plasticsurgerybeforeandafter.blogspot.com
Nicole Kidman as Virginia Woolf: listal.com
Scarlett Johanson: thehoesofhollywood.blogspot.com
gitls having fun: sucksorrules.com
androgymous person: sleevage.com
Shakespeare:shakespeare2006.net

Eye Candy Monday

Oh sexy people you look like you're having so much fun. Can I play too?

Photo credit:newperumetoday.blogspot.com

Historical Fiction - how do they do it?

I popped over to Justyne Elliot's blog to have a little read of her historical piece, and I was hooked so fast it was freaky. I just love that historical stuff. I can't do it, at least not yet, so I get an extra charge out of the way great historical romance writers make the language flow across the page as if it was effortlessly, almost carelessly, put together. That really gets me panting, as a writer and a reader, and I *love* when that happens. A snippet of her snippet from 1888 Part 2:

Florence giggled. “Jessie Carter, you are a radical. But you echo my own thoughts on the matter. Of course, Mama and Papa are set on moulding me into a perfect porcelain society belle with no thought in her head beyond snaring some chinless lordling and deferring to his half-baked wishes evermore.”

Creaaaaaaaaaaaam

1888 Part 3 is already up, so hustle your bustle on over to her blog as fast as you can and catch some of this steamy historical stuff.

I write contemporary erotica. Sometimes I write paranormal contemporary erotica. Although I do have an idea for a futuristic piece, it's not written yet.

But I do have an historical idea, finally. It takes place in
Japan in the 1800's. That counts, right? Actually, it's a futuristic historical piece set in Japan. And no, it isn't written yet. But that one definitely will be written because I am so very intrigued by the premise.

But this 19th Century stuff - I adore it but it scares me. All that attention to detail, the buttons the corsets the customs and the culture. Yikes. I don't believe I could do it without falling into purple prose, wherein my characters swoon and suffer from the vapours. So I will leave it to Justine and other talented mistresses of the genre, like Madelynne Ellis.This is from the free story on her website, "Any Port in a Storm":

Elsie lifted another garment. The state of Frank’s rough, work stained hands didn’t bother her. She imagined their touch would be soft enough when it suited, just like Taylor’s were. “I’m not looking for a husband,” she said. “I already have one. I’m just admiring what’s in plain sight, that’s all.”

At that moment Frank stood. Grimy black water spattered the cobblestones. His longjohns, once baggy, now clung to his hips and thighs, outlining muscles and hollows. Where it was in contact with skin the cotton had turned transparent, so that around the crotch his black bush clearly framed the swell of his balls and shaft.

Jessie whistled in response. “I take it back. Big boy, isn’t he? Shouldn’t we look away, or something?”

Hearing the whistle, Frank turned his head, and seeing his cousin, gave a wide goofy grin. “All right, Jessie,” he said. “Me mam’ll be right vexed if she sees you out here while I’m washing.”

Ah, sometimes it's great to forget about being a writer and lose myself in the joy of reading. Don't you agree?

xoxox Mad

Images:
corset: vitruvian-musings.tumblr.com
girls in 19th century dress: 860garmentsbyglenda.com
sexy stockings: unusualhistoricals.blogspot.com
sexy naked military man: johncoulthart.com

Eye Candy Monday - Golden Globes Edition

Okay I know Johnny Depp didn't win an award but he was nominated for two so I think that earns him (and his once love Kate Moss) top spot on my
special Golden Globes edition of Eye Candy Monday.

Here's a lady who did win, with her husband, who's probably won a few GGs in his time. Yes, this is them awhile back but - don't they look adorable? I like Warren Beatty but I goddam love Annette Benning. (Winner of this year's Golden Globe award for Best Actress in a comedy or musical.) The film, co-starring Julianne Moore, is called The Kids Are All Right.

And now - My real time coverage of the 2011 Golden Globes

Red Carpet: Most of the women are looking good this year and I'm noticing the pale lipstick.The gowns, by and large, are uncharacteristically unique and gorgeous.

It's nice to see Natalie Portman pregnant, (by her choreographer/boyfriend with the improbable last name of Millepied). I can actually hear, even from Canada, the collective sigh of relief of Hollywood wives. Presumably, Portman is off the prowl for at least the rest of the year.

Rickie Gervais is marvellous. He says he must not have done his job properly last year in order to be invited back this year and promises this year he will make sure they never invite him back again. So far, Ricky, so fab. I think he'll be back. He and Steve Carell did their usual who-hates-who-most schtick which, as Carell accurately commented, 'never gets old.'

Yes, I know, Johnny didn't win anything but he was nominated twice so I think it only fair to post two pictures of him in my blog.

Oh God it always makes me happy when the winning screenwriter was a nobody last year, as happened again tonight. He said, "A year ago I wouldn't have believed this was possible." That's the sort of story that keeps screenwriters banging away at the keyboard with the clear knowledge that they are simply sending letters hurtling into space to be sucked into a black hole. I can only hope the day never comes when all those consonants and nouns, not to mention grammatical marks, crash back to earth at the same moment, obliterating all of us.

But tonight is not about the bitterness of the 95% of screenwriters, actors, directors, producers who will never stand on that stage. Tonight is about watching the best of the best, the glitziest of the glitziest, and the most beautiful of the beautiful people celebrate their year. And everyone, from erotica short story authors to major movie stars, ought to get their time in the gorgeous sunlight. Like this improbable movie star:

Hey, Sly was there!
Okay, don't think I don't get the point of Eye Candy Monday, because I do. Proof:

Alright maybe he didn't look like that last night, but he once looked like that and I'm eternally grateful for his beauty. Oh and all the good things
he does for the world. And for his acting, sometimes, too.

Same goes for Matt Damon, who gave Robert De Niro a terrific introduction when de Niro was presented with the Cecil B. DeMille award. De Niro, whom I recall at one time could not articulate well enough to give an interview, was hilarious as well as eloquent. No cheat sheets, either. I hope his second standing ovation lasted the entire time the commercials played.

Sometime I'll tell you my real life Robert de Niro story. Perhaps Robert de Niro anecdote would be more accurate . . . but I do have one!

I'm doing this in real time, so I have to register a disappointment to see that Glee beat out The Big Bang Theory. No Glee pics on my site.

Wow, shout out to Paul Giamatti for a surprising win for Barney's Version,the movie made from Mordecai Richler's novel of the same name. Nice of Paul to salute "the great nation of Canada." Woo hoo.

Frankly, I'm impressed that The Social Network took the Best Picture Golden Globe. A new era is certainly upon us, and the two young actors (who didn't dash onto the stage with the rest of the above the line folks to celebrate, and has to be called up by the producer) are very likely to be the superstars of the future.

For me, in truth: If the Golden Globe Fairy Godmother cast a spell on me that landed me, suitably garbed, gorgeous (and single) in the middle of the festivities, and said I could take home anyone I wanted (also, by the same spell, unencumbered by wife or girlfriend) I think I'd be really happy to say to this fellow, 'Congratulations Mr Firth, my name is Madeline Moore.'

space junk photo from: dailymail.co.uk
canada shorts from wordans.com
all other celebrity photos from google